The Girl Squad Rules...

I don’t know about you, but my close female friends are some of the most important people in my life. With them I can share my secrets; my doubts; talk about my man; laugh at silly things and diss about my annoyances. They will encourage me, boost me and let me know when I’m kidding myself.

Inside those friendships is a place where I make myself vulnerable – a place where the bullet proof face I show to the outside world wouldn’t withstand a high velocity marshmallow.

It may be a stereotype but it’s real. Studies have found that women bond through shared intimacy and conversation. There are also health benefits to strong female friendships. They help us cope with stress better, recover from illness and may explain why we live longer than men.

Female friends are there for each other. We protect our female relationships fiercely because these are so important to us. The girl that breaks the rules of the relationship, for she will pay for the betrayal. The inner bitch will strike out. We may even lose the relationship and all the positives that go with it. Now that is stressful.

Ooooh, here comes my twinge of internal conflict again. I don’t even want to imagine that would happen. Oh, what if I broke those rules? Geez, I’d feel sick.

Wait a second. How would I know if I broke these rules? What are they?

The answer is quite complex. We’ll cover this subject over the coming posts. But, here’s one important over-riding rule.

Keep Your Account In Credit

Have you had the experience where some small thing has happened with a female friend or colleague and a voice in your head says ‘just wait a minute, this doesn’t seem fair’ ?

Well according to some fancy pant Dr this is our internal relationship balance calculator. The little voice which pops up when we sense that the balance has gone into debit.

Women build relationships by earning credits with each other. In order to maintain our relationships in credit, we subconsciously monitor the balance. 

No credits –no relationship – it’s as simple as that

What relationship rules do you think apply to your female friendships?

Ohhh the BRUTAL HONESTY!

I’ve been told many times that I’m a bitch, stuck up, I’m too honest, blah blah blah. I used to wonder if it was something I was doing wrong, so I spent a lot of time trying to understand why some people consider me a bitch. I mean I know I have RBF (resting bitch face) and I hope people don’t take it too personal its just who I am. Funny thing is I have literally dedicated my life to helping other people improve the quality of their lives.

Of all places, an Internet meme summed it all up for me and I suddenly figured it out.

My problem is my complete commitment to honesty. I am simply too brutally honest. Add to this the fact that I can see straight through bullshit and it is a recipe for offense. I wasn’t always this way. I used to be VERY passive, quite, only spoke when spoken too kind of girl. It wasn’t healthy for me and I ended up in an awful, abusive, controlling marriage. When I finally got out of that horrible relationship and took several years of many more mistakes I found the real me. I also found my now husband and was finally able to be 100% my true self and guess what he loved me for me. ALL OF ME!

You see we live in a culture of jazz hands. Put on a smile and tell people what they want to hear. Maybe, just maybe, passive aggressively try and tell someone the truth. But never in a way that could possibly offend anyone.

Fuck. That. Shit.

I don’t live like that and for better or for worse I won’t ever change this. SOMEONE out there has to deliver the truth.

So be forewarned! For now on this blog will be nothing but brutal honesty. And trust me I’m not just bullshitting you. I have first hand experienced combined with a personal training certification and lots of training.

Over the next week I’m going to break down the truths on why YOU ARE STILL FAT OR NOT WHERE YOU WANT TO BE FITNESS/HEALTH-WISE!